Birthdays, Holidays and good friends

First off one of my very good friends just turned 30! Danielle is such an amazing friend, she has always been there for me and never judges and would do anything for anyone. Love you girl and wish you the very best happiness and miss seeing you everyday at work.

Thanksgiving was good as usual. We are so very blessed with amazing family. We spent the first part of the day at Matt's family and the second half with mine. It was a busy but very fun day. My sister in law and I decided to run to town black friday but didnt do any shopping i just needed to hit up the pharmacy.
I wad very happy that M and I got 4 days together and that is the most since this new job. I am looking for a reason to go back to NC, it is absolutly gorgous and it is my new love I dream of someday going back. If it wasn't for my whole family being here I would pack up and leave tomorrow they are the only ones holding me here. Because I knoe the friends I want to keep up with will keep in touch and the others sorta drifted away and that is okay.
I am looking forward to Christmas but not as much as usual I guess it is just not the same M and I always pick O's presents out together and I of course had to go it alone this year but I have realized life is changing in so many ways. My husband is amazing and I thank God that I have him. He is wiling to do whatever it takes to support his family. He still loves it and the company is a good company to work for and that is really hard to find these days.
Olivia is.doing good in school her grades are slipping just a bit from the beginning of school so we r trying to get back on track. Her Christmas program is Tuesday night and I am super excited bc I have heard a lot from her. Well the weekend is coming to an end and I am okay with it bc I get a bit lonely on the weekends w/o M home and I don't get to talk to him much bc he works 7 days a week and doesnt get back to motel till about 6 or 7.
Well a little catch up I am still doing as good as I can be with my best friend gone but I am thankful we both have jobs.

I am in a Funk!!

I am in such a funk these past few months and I am having a hard time finding my way out o it! I have tons of stuff to be thankful for but I am just having a hard time getting past a few things! My momma is doing wonderful and again I am so proud of her!
My husband has only been gone since Monday and of course it is only Wednesday, therefore I am in for a VERY LONG month till Thankgiving! On a good note I am stoked my awesome cousin Kevin emailed me and invited me to his fall festivle party and I am stoked. It is crazy how as we get older and have families we kinda do our own things. Even though we live in thw same town we still only get together a few times a year, that's life right! But i am super stoked to be able to go and spend some time with them.
On the subject of life, hehe here we go! I sometimes have such a hard time thinking that I am almost 30 and still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. LOL I have realized inthe past few months that sometimes through life friends come and go and the ones that stay are true. I have had a hard time with this and feel that I am always the one to blame. Just because I dont give up all o my spare time does not mean I wouldn't do anything for anyone. I hate when someone says that I let them down and was not there for them. It kills me but at the same time I look back at what i have done yes I may not do everything but I am there when needed. What I dont get is people do not know how to communicate, if something is bothering you or you need someone's help just ask. Too many people dont and then get mad because "well you should have known". Well forgive me for stressing over my own life! And there is also a way of talking to people and working through problems instead of talking down to someone and making them feel awful.
Okay anyways I feel much better to get that off my chest! And NO this is not directed at one certain person it is just how I feel. I am here to live for God and take care of my family I try and treat people with respect and listen with an open heart! God is teaching me more patience and more tolerance nd definatly forgiveness! Well I am off for now maybe I will rant some more later! :)

Baby oil

So had a good weekend with Matthew this weekend, it ended too soon! I had just the funniest story I had to tell about Olivia. So she went to take a bath the other day and normally she takes a shower and does it all by herself. Well it was taking her way too long so i went to check on her and she was just sitting there. Ha here comes the funny part i sat on the side of the tub and put my feet in the water to help her was up and for some odd reason it was all oily. So i asked her if she poured baby oil in the tub and she just looked down like she was totoally busted. So i got her cleaned up and drained the tub and of course it is still really slick! I explained to her that she is not allowed to touch it, that it was for me to use to shave my legs. So then I go to wake her up for school and her hair was so oily and yuck. Her teacher prolly thinks she hasnt bathed in weeks. Lol. And on top of that I almost busted it taking a shower this morning! Oh the joys of having a 6 year old.

Random Thoughts!

Okay so tonight I am sitting here texting my husband. I just miss him so much but he is doing what we need to do right now. I wish life was a bit easier at times but I am so thankful for what I have. God is seeing my family through some rough times but I try to keep in mind it could be worse. I love my husband more than I could ever express.
Onto some other thoughts this past month has been whirlwind of tears of fear and sadness and lots of tears of happiness. My mother is 100% cancer free. It is amazing the prayer chain that was going on during this scary time. She is recovering very well and I am so VERY proud of her and hope I am half as strong as she is.
My daughter has been dong so well in school. I have to brag a bit she is reading like a pro. So I think is time to have a little mother daughter outing next weekend to the Public Library here is town. I have heard they have an amazing kids section. I have to admit I am a bit excited too.
Work has been pretty good I mean I get paid to play with the cutest babies ever. I love them and it is totally crazy how attached you can get to them little stinkers.
Okay so there is this new seires called "Whitney" and I think it is so funny and I absolutly recommend that everyone try to watch it next week. So funny! Okay so that is about all I have to say.

Maybe some pics to go with a post some are of my baby girl and the others are my precious kiddos at work!

God is AMAZING!

Okay so to start I have an update about my beautiful Momma. She was diagnosed with Renal Cell carcinoma about 2 1/2 weeks ago and let me tell you that was a shock that none of the famliy was ready for AT ALL. She has been going to a doctor who I will refrain from names who I will have to say has lost his touch if her ever had any at all. I hate to say that but it is true. So needless to say eventually he got the hint and sent her to a doctor that was better equipped.
The day we found out was awful and since I didn't know much about it then I was totally freaked out. But as a few days went on I heard more and more sucess stories, but you never forget the possibilities. So there were testing and testing and more testing on my poor momma who was feeling awful anyways and then having to be stucked and poked I just wish it could have been me going through the pain instead of her.
So anyways her surgery was last Thurday and we were all at the hospital waiting and waiting and some more waiting. It seemed like the longest day in my whole entire life. The doctor started cutting at 12:15 pm and we were told the surgery would take at least 4 hours, so you can imagine after an hour and a half when they told us the doctor needed to see us we were a little freaked out. Most people would say less time is better but in this case with all the blood loss she already had we were a tad worried. So in comes poor Dr. Tuerkirst, he probaly thought we were one nutty family, He told us the surgery was a breeze and she hardly lost any blood. WOW AMAZING GOD! All my sister and I could do was burst into tears. Then he tell us that he also had to take her gall bladder out as well, talk about a 2 for 1 special!
So she obviously has a long road to recovery but that is what we are for and my momma means the world to me and I will always be there for her no matter what. She is recovering very well, very tired but all I can say is that God is truly amazing and prayers are answered everyday.
I am so thankful to the family and some of my very close friends who have stood by my side and my families. It is amazing in times like these how close it brings some people and some not so much. My mom is on her way to feeling like herself again and she is CANCER FREE!!!!!
Life is amazing and my family is great, and I havae the best friends I could ask for. My mom is doing great and we got to spend the weekend with my husband what a blessed weekend. Glad to see the weekend come to a close on such a good note because it is one more day till my mom is recovered but sad in some ways because it is hard to say good bye to my husband for another month. I can't say that is has gotten easier at all. We have established a routine but it is really hard coming home alone. Yes I know I have my sweet girl but it is still lonely. Well off to get some sleep so I can be well rested to take care of 6 of the most sweetest babies ever tomorrow.

Waiting for the Storm to Pass!

Last week we found out some really bad news for our family. My mother who is an amazing women found out she had Renal Cell Carcinoma Stage 2. This cancer is incurable if you catch it to late. So they sent her for many tests. I have had many many people who are just amazing praying for our family. She had a bone scan and chest x rays and all came back clear so it has not spread. Your kidney is about 12 cm and her tumor that is attached to her kidney is almost 15 cm. Wow talk about huge! The doctor said that she probably had this for years. The first doctor she went to knew she was losing blood somehow for a few years now but he is a fruit and I will not go back to him. So finally he sent her to another doctor and now she is on her 3rd doctor. She has one more test to map out her viens and how her blood if flowing to the tumor, then is surgery. They will remove the kidney and tumor and I am itching for her to get it out. I plan on being by her side to help as much as possible, I have some pretty good bosses so they will help out when they can.
My mother has been my rock and had always been there for me through everything. Now it is mine and my sisters turn to be her rock and I know I can do it. I am such an emotional preson it sometimes is very hard to hold the tears back. She is amaazing and I know God will take care of her through surgery and recovery. God can do amazing things and I put Every ounce of my faith in him to help our family through this rough patch in our lives.
No one prepares you for everything you must face in life but I believe you learn through all your experiences and my family will get through this.
My mother is a fighter and she is going to do fine so please keep her in your prayers.

Catching Up!

Okay so I am a little late with these pics. But oh well, We recently went to Robinsville, North Carolina. Let me say this is the most beautiful place I have ever been to. Someday maybe even to live. My husband to a job with a construction company there and they do big commercial jobs and a lot of goverment work as well.
Which moves on to my first subject, I give a lot of credit to full time single parents. I have really had a tough time adjusting to pretty much raising my daughter alone. I have adjusted some but I still have days of being lonely. My husband is such a wonderful man he will do whatever it takes to support his girls. He loves what he does and the company is such a good company to work for.
Anyways the little vacation was amazing. We spent one day in Pigeon Forge TN and it was awesome and way better than branson. We went to a place called Parrot Mountain and it was this amazing sanctuary on top of a mountain and there are hundreds of exotic birds, and if you know me I am an animal lover. Olivia was the most impressed because she was able to handle a scarlet Mccaw and have her picture taken with birds all over her. The trip was fabulous! and then of course some pics...







So after all the visiting and driving and hiking. We ventured home on the 12 hour drive. Before I left I had a spot on my left leg and by the time I left to come home it was way worse. So once I got home off to the doctor and he gave me some antibiotics and sent me on my way by the next day my knee was so swollen and had a fever throughout my whole leg so after work I decided to head to the ER. And of course that is where I stayed. NOT FUN! So no more of that all better!
I loved North Carolina and the hospital not so much!

I Love My Husband!

So I got off of work yesterday and called my husband like I have done everyday since he left. We talk about our day then I always tell him I will call him when I get home. So Olivia and I head home and I get dinner going and get some laundry going and Call Matt back. We start talking about the job and I didn't think anything about the fact that he was driving. The original plan the day before was he was coming home the end of next week. But to my surprise when I finally caught on he was about 4 1/2 hours away from home.
I was stoked and crying! I know imagine that me "Emotional" LOL. Well anyways I scrambled around and cleaned up until he got home. It wasn't too bad but I wanted to get all my weekend cleaning done so I didn't have to do anything the whole weekend.
So I decided that I would not tell Olivia that Daddy was coming home, she still thought that it would be another week. I really wanted daddy to be the one to just show up. Well she fell asleep about 9:45 and he got home between 10:30 and 11. of course I didn't want to quit hugging him but I have to share. ;) He went in and woke her up (poor girl is so much like me) She woke up and looked at him and went back to sleep. Needless to say this morning when she came in our room and saw him laying there it was priceless and once again I was tearing up. She latched on to him and hasn't really let go all day. I love my little family and the best news is that I get him till June. I am stoked to be coming home to him everynight next week. I do believe the next time he leaves will be harder for all of us but eventually we will get into a groove! He is one amazing man that does what has to be done for his family even if it means living in a hotel for a month at a time. But he is good at what he does and he loves it. Well I am off here to cuddle and watch another movie.

Going on Week 3!

Okay so this week will be the 3rd week that I have not seen my husband. He has taken a new job and is traveling with a good company out of North Carolina. We talk and text several times a day but it just not the same.
I have to say this has been the hardest thing our family has ever had to go through and I feel we are doing as well as expected. My bosses let me have Friday off because I felt very overwhelmed with all the changes in my life right now, so I took the day to myslef while Olivia was at school. I feel very refreshed and am ready to head into the week with a new attitude!
I have a tendancy in taking things out on others without even realized so this weekend i have done a lot of praying and asking for some major patience and I think I got the answer I was looking for. I have come to realize many things this weekend and done a lot of sole searching and I feel that I am ready to try it all out and be thankful for everything I have and not focus on the negative. I have an amazing husband who is sacraficing time away from his family to do what is best for us.
It does make it easier because we make it a habit every night to call daddy so we can say prayers right before bed because that was a habit before he left. I will say the worst part of every night is saying good night knowing he is not going to be next to me in bed and won't be there when I wake up.
Well I will say good bye for now! Here is my amazing Husband!

Everyday is a circus for us

Okay so this weekend was the circus and at the last minute I texted Brooke and asked if I could take Audrey with and she said yes! YAY The girls Had so much fun together. We meet my sister and BIL and my niece and had so much fun.
We Started out riding the ponies of course and then to the show.


Here is little miss Audrey

My sweet niece Dana LOVED the pony she did such a good job holding on and petting the horse at the same time! So darn cute


The girls eating their cotton candy


Liv and her pony!

Of course I had to make them pose for one


And then I gave them the option of a toy of face painting and this is what they chose! Silly girls they just Love each other but yet fight just like sisters!

So this was my first attempt at taking pictures off my IPhone and it worked I can't believe it! So I will end on saying I am ready to go play with my babies tomorrow and I am excited. I might not be able to get pregnant now but I still get my baby fix everyday. I LOVE MY JOB and the girls I work with.

Here are a few old ones off my phone:


This one is actually last week Liv had the stomache bug wednesday so dad kept her home one more day to be sure and they worked around the yard and this is what I came home too. Pink and grey stripped shirt white pants (outside) with red hearts and her cowgirl boots! I am so glad we live out in the country where not very many people would see this, HA!

My lil chef. This hat and apron was a gift from aunt Kay and she loves going to gmas to bake stuff!

This was at her Christmas party at school. She is such a ham!


Last but not least this was my baby girl the first day of kindergarten not nervous one bit. I remember brooke and I decided we would take the girls together and as soon as she got out of the van I bawled like a baby and brooke laughed at me. I am so thankful to have a friend/boss who helps me so much picking Olivia up from school and another wonderful friend Lindsey who takes her to school. You girls are great and I am very thankful to have you in my life andhave someone whom I trust with my child. Thanks

28 Things You May not know about Me!!

So I stole this from Lindsey's blog so I figured I would just go ahead and do it..

1. I am addicted to Diet pepsi and Unsweet tea.

2. I LOVE to take naps but I just can't seem to sleep much these days.

3. I Absolutley LOVE to take pictures and wish I new a little more how to use the options on my camera.

4. I also am addicted to playing games on the XBOX 360. My favorite is all the Halos, I know it sounds funny my husband makes fun of me all the time.

5. I know how to run the tractors just not very good.

6. I HATE putting clothes away. I don't mind doing laundry and folding but I absolutly hate putting them away.

7. I DO NOT trust many people, I have been burned too many times and I just can't seem to find very many that I can trust to tell everything too.

8. I am such an emotional person. I can cry at the drop of a hat.

9. I am an animal lover! I have 3 labs, 2 cats, and a parrot. I also have had african tree frogs, bunnies, hermit crabs, and several other dogs that just didn't work out. we usually don't have good luck with cats but these 2 have stuck around for awhile.

10. I have been trying to have another baby the past 5 years and sometimes it gets me down. I have decided though that it will happen when it is suppose to and I definatly believe that it will happen when God decides it is meant to be.

11. I ust to attend church every wed night, sunday and sunday night. I wish I would have never quit but I do teach Olivia what I can. I wish i knew more myself.

12. I am in Love with the following shows: American Idol, Ax Men, swamp loggers, law and order SVU, Teen Moms, 16 and pregnant. It kinda makes me sad a little cause I could not imagine at 16 having a baby, and I am so terrified having a girl that I can only hope I can raise her right.

13. I get Sun burned almost every time I am outside.

14. I love the fact I get to play with babies everyday.

15. I love Fall and Spring the best and I love to plant flowers.

16. I do like to plant but I hate most yard work even though I am usually the one that mows the lawn.

17. My husband and I tuck our daughter in every night and say prayers with her ever night too. We have done that since she was born.

18. I loved being pregnant and i loved the labor even though it was awful.

19. My daughter wasn't breathing when she came out and we weren't allowed to see her for almost 5 minutes until she was stable. Stubborn little terd.

20. I have a sister who is 4 1/2 years older than me and I LOVE her to death and wish we did more together.

21. My husband and I got engaged after 4 months of dating and were married 1 week before our 1 year anniversary. This year we will be married 8 years and together for 9. I HEART him a lot

22. We owned our own business for 3 years and it took 1 person to totally screw us over to make us realize it wasn't worth it. So he took a new job and will be traveling A LOT

23. The whole time we have been married the longest we have been away from each other is 3 nights. As I said in #22 he is going to be traveling which means he will be gone 3 to 5 weeks at a time and home for the weekend.

24. Once I have a person's trust it only takes one time to mess that up and if i say I won't tell I WON'T!

25. My house is not perfect and it is very lived in. I clean but it never stays that way.

26. I love to buy my daughter clothes even though she never wears half of them

27. I will go back to school one day

28. I didn't realize how hard it was gonna be to think about 28 random things. Wow I am glad this is over

Ready for another week at work and then the weekend. Waiting for the call that Matt is gonna have to pack up and head out. It will be a HUGE adjustment and my family will be there for support and hopefully I have some great friends to help too. I am concerned how Olivia is going to be in his abcense. I hope she adjusts okay.

Well happy sunday and Hope ya have a wonderful week!

It's time for a count down

So Matt should be leaving for his new job soon and I am worried. I know that this is what is best for our family and I am reall gonna love having insurance again. but this being gone anywhere from 3 weeks to 5 months is gonna be tough on not only me but Olivia too. I know that eventually I will be asking when he is gonna go back to work. LOL I know it will work out and I have some amazing friends and family to help with support.
I have been having a little pity party for myself the past few days. Just one of those weeks, Well it is turning into a month actually. Can't seem to find a grove for anything. I hate not having control of anything and everything in my life, So I am slowly learning to go with the flow but it is really hard.
On another subject it has been 5 years since we have tried to have another baby and it is really getting me down. I did fertlility treatments but without insurance I am at a stand still as to my options right now. I am thankful that I get to work with babies all day so I don't get so down. But it seems every month gets a little harder and I just keep hoping to be surprised one day. I would even be okay to feel awful the whole time. I wish that I had more money and I would just adopt a baby or even siblings. I know that God has a plan and I am waiting somewhat patiently. I try but I am making no promises.
I also wanna thank a certain someone (no names mentioned bc she knows who she is I hope) you are a great friend and Where were you way back when? You always listen and seems to make me feel a little better. You are a great person and a true frind is hard to come by. Love Ya
okay so I am done venting and having a pity party!

My Life!

So last weekend after my daughter was feeling better after having the flu we ventured to the lake once again and took Harley my first born. Ha Naturally he LOVES water! He is the greatest dog ever and him and Olivia have grown up with each other. Liv loves to go for walks and Yes that is my dog under water. He is so funny you can throw a rock and he will dive and get that exact rock. I tell Matt all the time he should have been a drug dog cause he can smell everything. Well enough catcing up tonight I am beat and I think I need to hit the Hay. Night all

SLEEPOVER!!!

So a couple weeks ago Olivia had a friend over and it was sooo much fun. We started out picking up Audrey and heading to West Plains Civic center for the Monster Jam. Which we were all pumped up about!



We had to have so pictures before we left the house and couldn't resist Mitchum's Sweet face!


So we got to the Civic Center and it was not impressive at all. It was small and the fumes from the trucks were really bad. So after about 15 minutes of that we left to find something else to keep us busy. A few while we were there..





Which Lead us to the lake which is just a couple miles down the road from my house. I have to say it is such a long drive to town but I LOVE the country so peaceful and I don't really worry about anything. I got some really good pictures of the girls. Man they should have been sisters I love spending time with them because they crack me up with all the things they come up with. Never a dull moment.

I am SO behind!

Ok so it has been so long since I have been on here and I have a lot of catching up to do. I don't wanna go back 2 years so just the most recent!
My baby turned 6 and is in kindergarten this year and I can't believe how fast she is learning. It just blows my mind. We had her birthday at the preschool I work at and we rented a bouncy house and the kiddos had so much fun.





Here is a couple of Olivia'S best friend Audrey and of course Danielle and Brooke with some Bieber FEVER!!!!!





I have to say I have the most awesome friends and co workers I could ask for! It makes it so much easier to go to work when you know there will be lots of laughs!

I am back!

So it has been crazy around our house lately! Olivia has had the flu the past few days and let me tell you I do not like seeing her sick at all! We are also getting prepared for daddy leaving for his new job in the next few weeks! Mommy is really not looking forward to it!
My big girl turned 6 a couple weeks ago and I am so amazed at how good she is doing in school. She reads a lot and is just getting so smart. Well as soon as I get my wifi up and going I have tons of catching up to do on pictures!