American Idol Baby Blues

Our journey to having another beautiful baby started when O turned a year old. And so far it has been nothing but failed trys. about 2 years ago i did 6 months of Chlomed and some hormones. After the fourth month the Doc told me that if it hasn't happened yet then ti probably isnt going to. Well I still finished my last two months and he was right it was a no go. I was diagnosed with PCOS which I still really don't know a whole lot about it. I do know that it makes you gain and very hard to lose. Over the past few months we talked and decided that we are done and God has blessed us with one awesome girl. I am not going to lie there are a lot of times that I do get teary and let it out and wish that I could be selfish and have just one more. I have even researched adoption which I still think someday it is my calling I just wish it wasn't so expensive. I know that there are millions of people who try for years and never have one but I am blessed with what I have. As I am sitting here writing this(just to get it off my chest) I am watching American Idol from last week, yes I can't believe I am so behind but honestly I haven't watched TV in 2 weeks, there was this amazing girl. She had an amazing story and background. Those are the people that I absolutly Heart them. Not that the others don't deserve it but I came from not a lot of money so I can relate. It is just different to actually work for something than to just having when you want it. Yes my dad helped my sister and I withour first vehicle but after that we were on our own. But when we need help they never turn their backs. Anyways this girl from TN lives in a tent in the woods, at first I was like really you can't even get assistance. But really some people want to do it on their own and not recieve help. Her husband works everyday, they cook their food over the fire and sleep on a mattress in a tent. Wow I really sat there and thought to myself I really take a lot for granted. Here I am being sad over not having a second child and these people don't even have a home. Well let's just say she was good and got a golden ticket and I can't wait to see what she has up her sleeve. I am happy for her that for one week she will get to sleep out of the rain, cold and in a real bed. I pray that she goes on further and does some amazing things. Well on a happy note a week from tomorrow I will go pick up my husband down by Ft. Smith and bring him home for the weekend, his girls miss him. He started traveling back in May and it has been hit and miss when we get to see each other. Not gonna lie it is still very hard to see him leave but this is what is best for our family and it is an awesome company and they take good care of him. They still ask him I am ready to move up there but I just don't feel it is the right thing to do. Well time to go fight with my daughter to wash her stinky body (LOL) and then go to bed. Spelling and reading practice has gone really great this week now to actually ace her test to see if it is a trip to the movies for us girls. Signing off till next time for some random crap that I think of. I should have named this blog "The Crap that I think of at the dumbest times"